Relationships II: Personal Experience Pt. 2

(Starting where I left off)

    And that same next got me more bull. Rodger and I became an official couple. It was alright. But he wasn't allowed at my house, considering the fact my parents knew the deal. And since they liked Darius and was mad at Rodger for the mess, they had a good reason to deny him. So basically I only saw him when I was out and about from time to time. I was completely faithful, and all the guys that wanted me, I remained intact and calm. It was all good until the phone calls and feelings started to change. I mean I was in love with this guy. But I guess that scared him away and whatever, and we talked less and less. So I finally got the nerve to ask him if he was seeing someone else. He gives the usual answer No. But my gut feeling was telling me otherwise, and my heart was saying just trust him. I was completely being pulled at both ends. Enough being said, he eventually broke up with me, with some lie to seal the deal. I was crushed. All I did was cry, I couldn't understand what went wrong until I was talking to ym buddy of mine. (YM= Yahoo Messenger) He was like I know this girl that was dating him too, and I was like ok. Eventually she wrote me and told me what happened between him and her.

    Come to find out, we were dating him at the same time. Certain events that happened lined up exactly with hers, and made me furious. Then she told me, he left her for her ex-best friend. I was like Whoa! What a dog and a fool I was. So I gave *Gale* the idea, to warn her about the dirty dog he was but I guess she didn't either. Long story short, they are not dating anymore, he cheated on her. Mind you, this is over 2 ½ years and funny how me and him still talk on associate terms only. I just want to know how miserable the sucker is doing. God has avenged me well to say. But God has also avenged Darius by using Rodger. By the way, Gale and I are good friends, Rodger gave me a new friend and didn't even know it. Ha!

    I finally put my pride and fear aside and called Darius. After all the times I called, I knew he wasn't ever going to pick up the phone. That hurt real bad. I felt like shit because I was stupid to leave a good man for some loser. (Note: The 80/20 rule is real. I am a true believer of that.) It was going on a year that I was still not getting any contact with him and that was getting the best of me. One day, I asked God to give me the chance to apologize to him and get his forgiveness and grace. Because I truly believed nothing was going to be fixed in life, until I apologize.

    Needless to say, months went by since that prayer, I checked my MySpace and he sent me a message saying "What's Up?" Mind you I did not even know he had a MySpace. A big cheesy smile appeared on my face, because I knew God had come through for me. I finally told him I am sorry and asked for his forgiveness. I felt relieved, and all that weight and pain has been lifted off my shoulders. Honestly, you'll never know what you got until it's gone. I mean I have learned so much and I just thank God for the opportunity to be mature and set free.

So you should learn:

1. Don't cheat. The one you are cheating with may and probably will cheat on you. If not, they are going to hurt you in some way sooner or later. GOD will make you reap that harvest of deceit sooner or later. Trust me, from firsthand experiences that is not pretty.
   
2. Choose wisely. Make your decisions on the basis of your future, because you have to live with it the next morning.
   
3. If you do not know what the 80/20 rule is please look it up or watch "Why did I get married" the movie or the play. The movie will explain it better though. Or let's just say, "Don't leave the one you love for the one you like."
   
4. Swallow your pride and grow up. It's the best thing to do.
   

I really hope this experience helped someone out there. As long as it helped one person, I am fine. Learn from other people's mistake, you'll get through life easier. Hopefully, you learned from mine. I was retarded when I was younger, well in that mindset of being retarded. I have matured and since then, I haven't been the same. I told you this because I felt I need to, I told I keep it real, I am not ashamed of anything I do. But I do regret some.

*Names were changed to not hinder their lives in any way.*

Diva Updates:

1. Next topic will be on Seeing Adversity in a different way. See you until then. Plus I will be trying the find the video of Joel Osteen's message pertaining to this so maybe you can understand better.
   
2. Tell your friends and family about this blog and comment, it really helps to read your comments about the topic.
   

 

 

Relationships II: Personal Experience Pt. 1

Side note:

I have my head held up high, catching all the eyes.

I sway my hips to a classy, yet sexy tempo.

The ones, who are not on my level, despise.

Thus, I take pride in who I am, it's that simple.

That woman is built in me, therefore knowledge is wise.

To go to extreme of someone's liking, I'll think twice.

Because I know that I am a Diva, and if you recognize it, you'll see it too.

 

Ok... Not starting where I left off. I want to talk about the opposite of last week's topic. The good woman, the real woman, the understanding woman, always being overlooked. Professionalism is a need in this very technical world. Professionalism in this topic means class, attitude, and individuality, which brought about liberation, thus being different. Liberation took its place and has been here for a while, which gave birth to independence. Independence has been exhausted to where it is slowly being taken back from us. I have a question for you.

While some women are single, they boast their independence as if it is a trophy, secretly wanting a man to take the bread winning place later on. Others claim their independence when they are single and when in a relationship, but still gives the man the kingship right he is entitled to. Is independence within a relationship supposed to be solely your responsibility to maintain, or do it like the bible says, when man and woman come to together, they are one, still making you independent in a sense with partner in the circle? Or is dependency the issue at hand and independence no longer exist? This will be discussed later on.

Back to your regular broadcasting:

I left off by talking about the other women. On an honest note, I was never the other woman and knew about it. But I have had the other man on the sideline. No, I am not boasting or anything, I am telling my dirt hopefully to help someone else not fall into a hole of mess and end up regretting it later.

    Well I was dating a guy *Darius* for some time now and I eventually met this guy off of MySpace. MySpace, yeah I know right! His name was *Rodger*, and he seemed to be a cool person. We like chatted and eventually exchanged numbers and began texting from time to time. He didn't live far and what not, so we met up and what not. Now, don't get me wrong, we were only friends during this part. I mean I was faithful to Darius, I was feeling him and he was cool person that kept me laughing. I mean he was this fun outgoing person, he was a good one. Well at least I think so. Come to find out, they knew each other; they both were on the football team or something like that at one point of time. I thought that was funny and weird at the same time. But it was all good.

Rodger was a skater and that attracted me, and I used the "I want to learn how to skate too", to basically to get closer. (He later told me, that he knew why I said that. Lol.) He knew I was dating Darius and what not, so he already knew the biz. Well time went by and all I know, we eventually dug the hole deeper with more dirt we did together. Big mistake!! I don't even know why I did it or why it even happened. But for some reason I didn't care. (Note: I regretted it later on.)

Prom was coming up and what not, (tells you almost how old I was) and I was excited. I went to 2 proms since Darius went to a different school than me. So that was interesting within itself, I felt very fortunate. I mean he treated me good but stupid ass, me, was not appreciating it. The night after my prom, we went out to eat at the only place that's open 3 in the morning. His posse came up there and I felt totally ignored, thank God I had my friend *Tracee* with me. She kept me company but eventually me and her went outside the restaurant and I saw a cutie and long story short. I was caught. He broke up with me and I really didn't care. In my eyes, I was like I got another in line, so the best thing for me to do was to say, "Next!" ………………………………………………….

*Well, just to let you know the rest of the biz on the old me is going to finish up next week. But answer my question about dependent or independent, I would really like to know what you think.

Note: Just because I met someone off the internet, doesn't mean it was a smart idea. I haven't done it since then. But I was blessed, not lucky, to meet a sane person. You should have good judgment, people end up getting killed every day.

 

We are all Superwomen!!! Its apart of being a diva

This is your xtra for the week so far. Enjoy the music, this is not the actual video due to copyrights and stuff of that nature. I am certainly thinking about making this the theme song for my podcast, which are in the making of production now, just watch out for those. They will be audio for now, until I make some video arrangements with some equipment.

The Poll of the Month: International Traveling

Answer: England

In search of the United Kingdom, well go ahead and visit England. I plan on visiting this place before my college years are over. Enjoy the food and the culture, just inhale all of it and make the best of it. I promise you will learn something by experiencing their life firsthand. Just make sure when you go there, exchange your money.

Also, as promised I am back with new blogs, let me know what you think. (Look below this poll, to get the new blog. J)

Relationships I: what are we looking for?? (Part 1: The Opening Act)

Let me think! I am an intelligent and beautiful black lady. Full of spark, comical at times, and loving at the same time, I am the full package!

It just bothers me that so many men don't even see that. Some of them think I am supposed to alter myself to their liking, um…. You lost something, yea, YOUR MIND! Or the ones that you want you to work around their time; I guess I met all the dogs. *Sigh* Counterfeit is no joke, don't pay close attention, you'll be lost and feeling bad later on.

I'm tired of hearing all of these men talking about "I need a real woman to hold me down", HELLO!!! Real women are everywhere, just for once look at something different than her body. I mean of course, first appearances and impressions are everything. The appearance, should be of course what attracts you, but pay close attention to how she carries herself, and please STOP THINKING WITH YOUR PENIS and use the head upstairs.

OMG!!! Plus this game is so old. I am here long enough to play along with you, take your number and never call. Yea, that chick might have been me. I am just sick of "Aye you", "Aye girl", "Pss", and all of that. Ugh, my name is not Aye!!!!! It is Shermere. Please approach me directly and correctly. I like excuse me miss or something of a gentlemen nature. If not, I'm going to look straight ahead, or around like I don't know where it is coming from. Or just be funny when you say "Aye" and bust out with "B", just don't be an idiot and respond back with "C". Lol

I just got to the point to realize that I am done with the dating scheme. I want to find Mr. Right that bring me the right ring and say "I do", SCRATCH THAT, I mean I want Mr. Right to find me and then say "I do". Yea I said it. It's what every girl wants. Maybe not now, but I want him now. Not to get married or anything, but I want him to get to know me for me, and form a real relationship excluding sex. Celibacy makes a relationship stronger; you can understand your partner's inner being better. I learned that the hard way, it throws everything off its friendly course, it's too emotional. Nevertheless, I want to find that man that makes me just do crazy stuff, in a good way. I'll be that woman to hold you up and keep steady ground within the foundation we made together. Keep everything in control and peaceful.

Hey, I am not that picky. I just want a real man. The right man. The understanding man. The Good man. The man for me. I don't want someone else's man, that is beyond me. I don't understand why so many women want to date someone who is in a relationship with someone else. If they took to the time to think about the situation they would not place themselves in that mess. If he doesn't care about the main woman in his life, what makes you the think he is going to care or even love the side woman? More than likely, he loves the main woman, but he just can't stay monogamous, that is a fact in some cases. (Lord, please don't send me that type of man!) When it all comes down to it, she is his main focus, he has to hide you from her, but it's funny that you know all about her. Just think about it. It's obvious that he doesn't care about your feelings, he cares about hers. Lol. You women crack me up.

This is just part one of the lovely event catch me next week as I disclose more mind numbing thoughts and revelations about relationships and how I see it. Comment and tell me what you think. Your opinions are always welcome.

D!V@ Updates:

1. Heart Seeker: What the heart longs for, is still in the making. I haven't forgotten about the snippet I promised I'm working on the finishing touches. I'm going to put a summary out soon, but I just don't know how soon.
   
2. This is month is totally about Relationships and anything dealing with that nature.
   
3. If you any ideas or request let me know. Email me at Divageneration@ymail.com, and I will respond as soon as I can. By the way, this is email I will be using for now on. Sheremere@yahoo.com will no longer be of use for this blog, because I will not check it anymore.
   

"Know what you're worth, who you are, and where you stand" That's D!V@'s motto and I will personally stick to it. It has meaning and value. But that's another conversation.

-Shermere.

Girls Are Like M&M's

This is very funny and it has interesting point. Plus, I think he's cute. :)